The New Standard: Yours
How do you define your standards? By others. The world. Your closest circle. The New Standard is when we break down our standards to be defined by our own knowing. Our own intuition. It's your own.
Pause. Close your eyes. When making a decision. When looking for opinions. When at a cross road. Left means this way. Right means that way. Close your eyes. Who do you see when you ask this question of the unknown. When you seek guidance. Do you seek others or your own.
I’m not here to quiz you. I’m here to write, and tell you what is coming through the ethers right now for me.
It’s time to start listening to our own standards. Our own reassessment of our beliefs. But not even. It’s not even about our beliefs. That’s not what we’re talking about here. We’re talking about OUR STANDARDS. & in this case it’s not the hotel.
Where are your standards? Where do they lie.
What are your standards? Where do they live.
Are you breathing your standards, in every choice, micro and macro decision you make. Our standards need to start becoming our virtue.
Do you know why?
Because if we don’t hold ourselves to our own standards, things are going to start happening for us on behalf of others.
Others will start defining our worth.
Others will start dictating how we use our time.
Others will be giving us the wrong advice, leading us down the wrong road.
You know what I’m talking about. You know what you want. You always have your eyes on the prize. You always know what’s best for you. Sometimes we know our standards and it just takes a really REALLY long time for the universe to start catching up with us.
This is when we know ourselves so well, that we might experience feelings of being disconnected from the world around us. Not really finding the right field of work or job for our soul, not really being surrounded by the people we’d like to be surrounded by, these imaginary beautiful field of DREAMING up our highest potentials. These are our standards.
If we find ourselves in the entropy, void, blank space for too long, we’ll start getting others opinions thrown our way, on how THEY think we should live OUR lives. Meanwhile they are just putting their attention off their own ways, and onto ours, to give themselves some comic relief off their own stresses they carry.
It’s time for the standards we have for ourselves to shine. Shine brighter than any other cross-road, opinions, answers, advice, guidance, from anyone but ourselves. Let’s adventure beyond. Pretend therapist don’t exist, probably could use one myself by now. Families opinions, or even eyes on what you create in this world. Picture the most provocative novel or singers half naked on stage. Their opinions, out the door, no longer matter, out, next. Friends? They begin and end when you start fully embodying who you are. But when it comes defining you, creating your magic in this world, they are just here to witness the final product. Peers? People you look up to in your industries? Past, present and future collaborators? Their drumming after your own beat.
The world is waiting for YOU to create YOUR own standards. No duh, I’m talking to myself right now through these words. But isn’t that all what the best authors do? We’re set out for own healings. So yes. Let’s switch it. I’m not referring to you at all. I’m referring to me. I am taking responsibility, radically. I am talking about MY OWN STANDARDS, for MY OWN LIFE. Because quite honestly, I can’t entertain everyone else’s standards of me anymore.
For too long, I’ve tried to be perfect and failed. I end up being the opposite. I’m upset at myself, I react to others, I never have met my own expectations of what I’m capable of. And when I do? I get criticized for it, blamed, threatened to be fired, or walked away from my lovers, best friends, you name it, it’s happened. Everyone I’ve let into my heart, my closest close, whether work or personal life. I’m not blaming them here. But I am saying that when I start truly living in alignment with myself, my joy, my days, they slowly start falling away, like the leaves on the trees. One week they fall beautifully with their color. The next, the eerie roads driven fall under the desolate trees with empty branches carving the skyline.
I want to start living by my own standards. Like really badly. I really want a place of my own. I really want to travel and see the world. I really want to love the work I do, and be in alignment with my purpose, to be impactful. I want to BE the cross roads where nature, consciousness, healthy mental and physical well-being, movement, women divine feminine rising, creativity, culture all of it, intersect. And it’s me whose in the middle of the multi-sectional ven-diagram.
I hold my standards so high for myself, that moment to moment I usually feel bad about everything I put out in the world, unless I’m truly in my zone of genius when time doesn’t exist, like painting a muse, or writing a poem. I typically have to be at the highest high or lowest low to get there though.
I set the standards so high for my creations in this world that sometimes I don’t know how to create. I look at my supplies, and feel empty. I fill the void with distractions. I don’t understand how putting a color pencil to paper will help save the world, the endangered animals, or the homeless, so I spend my time elsewhere like making $25-$40/ hour to learn and take a visit to the real world for 5-8 hours.
I set the standards of my physical health so high, that I end up injuring myself, out of the gym on medical freeze for months on end through the seasons. Influenced by the pain I feel inside my body, and what others tell me to do on how to fix it, or why it’s happening. Its your posture, your stress, just relax, you'r fine, you have to take a break from moving your body until we get you better, you cant move, don’t run, you’d really injure yourself doing that, you’d destroy your muscles doing that, it runs in the family…
And love life? Non-existent, don’t even ask why, lol. If you count Hinge dates and being laughed at, or advised against it, to be introduced to prospects via text for weeks and told not put out when you first see them, I can go on, but I won’t. This was actually the MUSE for this article tonight. When I thought about a past lovers’ recent success and wanting to congratulate them via text, I remember everything about and everyone I listened to and why it probably was the reason it did not work out. Or I was too ashamed to be honest with my truest standards in the first place that led me to disappointment… my bets on the later.
But this is where I question. Is the cross road to lower my standards? That doesn’t sound right, because I’m still not at a point of fulfillment. If I raise my standards even higher, I won’t be able to reach them. This is where we come back to the beginning. The New Standards.
The New Standards, a chance to rewrite what we want. And here is the criteria that’s coming through for this,
BALANCED; THE NEW STANDARDS NEED BALANCE BETWEEN PUSH AND PULL, EB AND FLOW, GRACE AND FORCE, MASCULINE AND FEMININE.
ALIGNED WITH YOUR VALUES
ALIGNED WITH WHO YOU ARE IN THIS MOMENT
ALIGNED WITH WHO YOU WANT TO BE, YOUR HIGHER SELF
CONSIDERS YOUR EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL, METAPHYSICAL, MENTAL WELL-BEING, WANTS, NEEDS, REALITY AND IDEAL STANDARDS OF THESE GROUNDS.
HONEST, WE NEED TO BE REALLY HONEST WITH OURSELVES OF WHAT’S REALISTIC, AS WELL AS, WHAT WE WANT, GET THE VOICES OF OTHERS OUT OF OUR HEADS.
CO-CREATION AND COMMUNICATION BETWEEN OUR MINDS AND OUR HEARTS. WE NEED TO START BASING OUR STANDARDS ON WHAT OUR HEARTS DESIRES ARE, AN EVEN EXCHANGE BETWEEN SOUL AND EGO.
AN EVEN EXCHANGE BETWEEN SOUL AND EGO, BECAUSE THAT WAS A REALLY GOOD KEY.
So, what’s it going to be? Are we going to start writing The New Standards for ourselves?
There might be something here for us. It’s up to you though, to listen to your own knowing on what needs to be done next.
With love and gratitude as always,
xx V